Day 14 – An Infinitely Lazy Day!
Today, like yesterday and the day before, was an extremely lazy day. I’m not sure if it is the depression or the weather. The weather has certainly changed, and the sun remained hidden behind the clouds at noon. I woke up fresh, ready to get some work done, run errands, etc., but the bed called. I’d gotten up too early, and mornings depress me just as much as the sun does, so I went back to bed. The curtains covered 3/4th of the frosted glass window, and from my snuggly comforter I watched the dim blueish white light pour in slowly.
Last night, while out and about, I think I caught the flu. I knew I was down with something when I got home, my whole body burning up like a low-end computer running a high-end game. I woke up fresh but feeling like shit, with a blocked nose and a sore throat. I took something for the flu and returned to the bed. While I hibernated in slow-motion, the time flew by. Every few hours I got up to do something, eat maybe, roam around the house before returning to the bed again. I can’t exactly sleep but I lie in bed in a somnolent state. It feels as if this is my body’s way of catching up on all those sleepless nights. I don’t feel any fresher when I wake up, in fact, even sleepier.
There’s so much I love about winter, including the fact that I can go to sleep without having to turn on the fan. Silence is my best friend. When there is no noise in the room, my mind expands; it fills the entire room and I feel lighter. Just lying in the bed with my eyes closed, comfortably warm, I can see my thoughts spread about in the room like files and folders on a desktop. I can focus, then, on one thought at a time if I want to. But, mostly, I just let them be. I enjoy the feeling of lightness, and I try to enjoy it while it lasts. There’s a reminder of the work I need to do every now and then, sometimes an alarm or an email on my phone, a nudge from my mind at others. I ignore them. I would like to get things done, but I also would like to sleep and relax while I can. When you are unable to sleep, when you have a chronic sleep disorder, sleep becomes really precious. It seems as if I’ve been hibernating on and off since the last 3 days. As I realised that it was time to write this post, I thought about skipping it, but since I’m committed to completing the 31-day writing challenge without missing a day, I got out of bed. I made myself a cup of soup and got on the laptop. Like everyday, I didn’t know what to write about. But before the crippling burden of thoughts hits me, as it does soon after waking up, I’m glad I was able to write this post. Unlike most of my other posts, I seem to like this one. This is certainly something I’d like to read.
Have a good winter, y’all!